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- In The Loop - |
I looked down at the compass that I was holding in my palm, feeling as disoriented as I typically do in the wee hours of the morning. The vast majority of individuals would greet a new day by getting up and starting over with their lives in the hopes of having a better day ahead. Simply put, I am not the right person for it. I am already aware of what is going to take place, as well as what will continue to take place on a daily basis in the foreseeable future. What actually took place was that I met a female while I was smoking on the roof of the building where I worked. She had gone to that location with the intention of taking her own life, but before she did so on that day, she presented me with a compass. Since then, I have never stopped thinking about that moment in the hopes that I can find a method to prevent her from ending her life. Every possible outcome I tried out ended with her passing away, and I was left with a compass that stuck with me for the remainder of the day. I have no doubt in my mind that the compass was the impetus for her mental breakdown and her suicide attempt that day atop the thirty-story building. Some of us would imagine that it would be wonderful to live forever without ever getting one day older or closer to our grave, but God has always had a good reason for allowing death to be a part of our existence. Everything must eventually come to an end in order for it to be able to start again. That's just the way life is. I am aware that I formerly existed within this artificial and fixed domain of time and space, which was continuously cycling through itself. This compass is my one and only hope of finding a solution to this conundrum other than simply erasing all traces of my existence in order to free myself from the confines of this space and time. There has to be some other way out of this predicament besides just doing that. I'm certain there is.
